May 26: Humor

Money Matters.05b

May 26
Humor

404.
Don’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
~George Burns (1896–1996), born Nathan Birnbaum, was an American comedian, actor, and writer.

405.
Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
~Ambrose Bierce. Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce (1842–1913) was an American editorialist, journalist, short story writer, fabulist, and satirist.

406.
When a fellow says it ain’t the money but the principle of the thing, it’s the money.
~Charles Farrar Browne (1834–1867) was a United States humor writer, better known under his nom de plume, Artemus Ward. At birth, his surname was “Brown.” He added the “e” after he became famous.

 

May 26: Humor

future 2mb

May 26
Humor

 

404.
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
~Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (1979)

 

405.
When you are courting a nice girl, an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder, a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity.
~Albert Einstein

406.
There is not the slightest indication that energy will ever be obtainable from the atom.
~Albert Einstein (1879−1955) in Robert Youngson, Scientific Blunders: A brief history of how wrong scientists can sometimes be, Robinson, 1998

 

Chief Hypocrite Preaches about Walls

Chief Hypocrite:

“We don’t need walls,”

While back home he

Constructs one tall.

~Day